By Filipina Az
This article is in no way to offend any honest Filipinas out there. This is to those who are taking advantage or using foreigners. I was so inclined to write about this subject due to I have gotten so much queries from foreigners of whom they have suspected that the ladies they have currently chatting online are liars, users and scammers. This only serve for them to be on the look-out!
With the dawn of Skype, Yahoo webcams and Viber, there are truly no communication barriers between foreign men from all over the world who adore Filipina women and Filipinas who appreciate foreign guys. Say good-bye to long wait times of traditional pen pal arrangements and ambiguities of emails and online chats. You can talk with your Filipina friend face to face through Skype. It’s no wonder a lot of Filipinas are going overseas to marry their cyber friends and many foreign guys taking up residence in the Philippines to be with their Filipina wives and girlfriends. For the most part, such online relationships produce happy endings. However, there is a growing trend of Filipinas scamming foreigners. Far from seeing Yahoo webcams and Skype as pathways to cementing possible lifelong relationships, some Filipinas are looking at these communication tools as ways to defraud guys from all over the world. There have been cases of men showing up at Manila International Airport with no Filipina girlfriend to welcome them because, guess what, they were just scammed in coming to the Philippines. There are many stories of guys sending money religiously to their Filipina girlfriend, when it turns out; these women were just giving the money to their husbands or boyfriends. If you don’t want to become a scam statistic, be on the lookout for the following signs that your Filipina friend might be just scamming you.
Always in need of money
Let’s face it, the Philippines is a developing country. It could use more economic development. The truth is that the majority of Filipinos are generally poorer than in developed countries. With that said, there is a wide range of approaches that people employ to address poverty. Always begging for money is usually at the bottom of the list of approaches. Most normal Filipinos will go out and get a job. Sure the job market may be soft but there will always be a job for people who put in the work to find a decent living. Be on the lookout for women whose first option is to always hit you up for $100 here or $200 there. Usually they couch these requests for money by telling you a story that there was an emergency of one kind or another in their families or their personal lives. When you see a pattern where you are dealing with a woman who seems to be in always desperate need of cash, it may be in your best interest to cut off all ties. You just might be getting played.
Not telling you she’s married or in a relationship.
One of the most common lies scamming Filipinas tell their foreign boyfriends is that they are single and available. The truth is that many Filipinas get married really young, especially in the province and those who come from a lower socio-economic level. There is nothing wrong with being poor but that is just the reality. Many tend to get married younger and that tends to perpetuate the cycle of poverty. Many Filipinas think that their foreign boyfriends will no longer talk to them or cut them off if they find out that they are in a relationship or married. At best, you are dealing with somebody who wants to have her cake and eat it too. Meaning she’s already married or in a relationship and getting the benefits of that while getting your money and your online friendship. At worst, she was never into you at all, and she’s just milking you for cash. You need to learn how to get this information out of her. Be very skeptical of the information she shares with you and try to look at any inconsistencies that might lead you to suspect that she’s already married or in a relationship.
Not telling that she already has a kid or many children
In the Philippines, a single woman who already has a child or children is not looked at as an attractive relationship partner compared to single women with no children. Right or wrong, there is a lot of stigma attached to a single woman with a child or children. In the United States and other economically-developed countries, there is no such stigma. It is very common for single guys to marry a woman who has 2 or 3 kids from previous relationships. It’s not a big deal, but many Filipinas will want to keep this information from you because they are either embarrassed, or they erroneously think that you will no longer be interested in them once you figure out that they have a kid or two. While in your mind, this might not be big of a deal or you may be more forgiving, you have to always look at what this lie means. If she’s willing to lie to you about this particular topic, what other topics will she be able to lie to you about? It all really boils down to questions of trust and integrity. Are you really dealing with a straight shooter or somebody you can’t rely on?
Not telling you her real story
Unlike in the United States, Canada, Australia and Europe where having a “past” is not a big deal, in the Philippines there is a lot of stigma to certain past histories. There is a lot of stigma, for example, on women who had drug problems in the past. There is this pervasive thinking that just because you smoked a joint at one time in the past, you were an addict or are is still an addict. That’s how strong stigmas can be. Another stigma is somebody who engaged in sex work in the past. For many reasons, otherwise middle class and respectable women will be forced to take that option to pay some emergency bills. It happens more frequently than many people care to admit. The problem is that when they try to hide this information from you. Again, it’s not a question of you being able to accept her past. It’s a question of her going through all this effort to hide it from you. Real relationships are based on trust, transparency and being able to depend on the other person to tell you the whole truth. So if she can hide these things and lie about them, then what else could she be withholding from you? More importantly, how can you trust her in the future?
Be on the lookout for these issues. Ask a lot of follow-up questions that would really try to dig through any inconsistencies and unearth the red flags. If you are still in the communication phase and haven’t proposed to your Filipina girlfriend yet, make sure your ears are open for any of these signals. If you have proposed to her already, made her your fiance,é and she is in the process of going to the United States or whichever country you are in, make sure that you have a long hard talk with her so that all cards are on the table and that there will be no surprises. You wouldn’t want to find out the hard way. After all, you are considering her to be your life partner. It all boils down to trust.
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